“It is all too easy to be bewitched by the marvellous architecture of Edinburgh. Here is my tribute to one of its finest triumphs of engineering.”
Oh Edinburgh, you citadel of stone,
Of buildings shaped for glory and command,
The ancient castle, now, is overthrown;
A greater palace dominates this land.
For of your many monuments of fame
And architecture beautiful and old,
There is a bastion that I proclaim
To be the best, most bountiful and bold:
Behold! Oh blessed Tower of Appleton!
Your slim proportions shine amid the light!
Like Babel brought to Southside, so you stun.
See, on the lower ground floor, out of sight,
A student couple, lying in repose-
Oh God, why aren’t they wearing any clothes?!?!
Illustration provided by Ruby Tait.